My family know that I am always talking to strangers. This is because I have a theory that everyone has an interesting story they can tell about their life’s
journey. There have been times when I have gone out to do something such as pop down to the shops and taken ages. I will have struck a conversation with someone I met for the first time and will be there listening and talking. Such encounters provide plenty of ‘me too’
opportunities. Today was no different.
Out walking my dog, I saw a lady coming towards me. I had not seen her before in the quarter of a century I have lived in our community. We both caught each other’s eye as we passed.
A ‘hello, how are you doing’ resulted in me learning that she lived at the other end of our road, “not the posh end” she said. She had lived in the area for over 50 years; I have barely lived that long. She worked in psychology at Birmingham University. Apparently, for her PhD, she had compared the parent-child
relationship of Asian and white young people. This was cue for me to tell about my own PhD which I have just started, with a focus on educational achievement of Pakistani boys in Birmingham.
We must have talked for about a quarter of an hour. During this time, we shared stories about our families as well as my dog; how intelligent he was, how often we walk etc. I told her about my children. I learnt her husband was a moral philosopher.
Sensing that our conversation was coming to and end, I asked her name. “Mary Stopes- Roe” was her response. I told her mine. We also exchanged our addresses especially as I wanted to get hold of a copy of her PhD.
Mary had said she was too old to be bothered with email and the internet, I realised when I got home that the World Wide Web had some interesting information about her. I learnt that she is “the daughter of Barnes Wallis and Molly Bloxam. Trained as a historian and psychologist, Mary worked for many years at the University of Birmingham where she had done her PhD. Since retirement she has been archiving her family’s papers, among which she discovered her parents’ courtship letters. Mary and her husband Harry have two sons and two daughters and ten grandchildren”.
I also discovered that I already knew Harry. He was the ‘stranger’ I had already encountered on a number of occasions. Recently, I had
learnt his name. He has his own interesting story, including being the son of Marie Stopes, the campaigner for women’s rights and a Vice President of the
British Humanist Association
I now look forward to learning more about Mary and Harry. It would be great if she finds her PhD dissertation. She said she would drop it
in.
I am also wondering which stranger I am going to meet next with his or her own interesting story.
PS
At the time I did not know that three years later I would fall seriously ill which would lead me to become a hospital chaplain. I recently estimated that over 2.5 years in that role I have listened to more than 1000 strangers